Stoner Questions to Contemplate When You’re High

Sophia Delphi May 09, 2022 - 6 min read
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A hippy stoned from smoking a marijuana joint

Anyone who’s ever toked up knows that you think differently when you’re stoned. And it’s no secret that some strains get your creative juices flowing more than others do.

No matter what you’re smoking, though, some truly bizarre questions can start popping into your head when you’re blitzed.

“How do bilingual people know which language to dream in?”

“Shouldn’t the airport worker who helps with luggage be called a ground cap and not a skycap?”

“Why do you fry bacon instead of bakin’ it?”

Here’s another, more serious question: why does pot trigger thoughts and questions that would never occur to you when you’re sober?

That last one is a lot easier to answer than the first three. Let’s discuss why weed plays with your brain in such weird ways. After that, we’ll suggest more stoner questions to ponder the next time you’re high.

THC and the Brain

You probably know enough about cannabis to know that THC provides its effects by interacting with the body’s endocannabinoid system (ECS). The ECS is responsible for sending and receiving messages that regulate most of our bodily functions.

More specifically, THC’s molecular structure is almost identical to some of the neurochemical messengers used by the ECS. That allows it to bind to the system’s “CB1 receptors” — and there are numerous CB1 receptors in the brain’s frontal cortex, responsible for functions like learning, memory, and problem-solving.

THC’s effects on the ECS have also been shown to alter the brain’s neural pathways, causing users to think in different ways when they’re stoned (and afterward, for heavy users).

There’s one more piece of the puzzle. THC has also been shown to cause something called hyper-priming in the brain, stimulating free association that leads people to have seemingly-unconnected thoughts when they’re stoned.

All of these effects help explain why so many artists and musicians have created masterpieces while high. It also helps explain why we all have unexplainable, weird thoughts when we’re smoking weed.

Here are some of the questions that may occur to you as THC does its magic tinkering with the ECS receptors in your brain.

Evergreen Stoner Questions For When You’re High

  1. Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
  2. Which was named first, the color orange, or the fruit?
  3. How did the first person to smoke weed come up with the idea?
  4. Is it possible to daydream at night? Can you have nightmares during the day?
  5. What does water taste like?
  6. Is it possible that dogs are smarter than we are, but have no way to tell us?
  7. Why do you drive on a parkway, but park on a driveway?
  8. Why does the Easter bunny hide eggs instead of baby bunnies?
  9. If a hall of mirrors is empty, what would be reflected in each mirror?
  10. Why do most police suspects only have first and last names, but assassins and mass murderers always have three names?

Serious Stoner Questions For When You’re High

  1. How would humans ever be able to learn the meaning of life?
  2. Since we all have our own beliefs, is it possible for anyone to really be objective?
  3. If the Big Bang created both matter and antimatter, why is the world made up of matter, but do scientists have to specifically create antimatter?
  4. If humans evolved from monkeys, why do we still have monkeys?
  5. If there was no evil in the world, how would we know?
  6. If we all lived forever, wouldn’t we all die from a lack of resources?
  7. Is there a limit to the amount of information we can store in our brains?
  8. Can a person ever be completely satisfied?
  9. Why is it so uncommon to see dead birds?
  10. Why does unhealthy food usually taste so much better than healthy food?

Somewhat-Serious Stoner Questions For When You’re High

  1. How did the first teacher in history learn what they knew?
  2. Who invented clapping, and why did they hit one hand with the other instead of hitting their stomach or face?
  3. If a jellyfish stings you underwater, can you cry?
  4. How can you squeeze the glue out of a bottle if it’s supposed to stick to things?
  5. If you meet someone special in France, do you English kiss them?
  6. If you did something to waste time and had fun doing it, was the time really wasted?
  7. Why is vanilla ice cream white but vanilla extract is brown?
  8. Is there a synonym for “synonym?”
  9. If someone disappears and the police only recover half their body, are they buried in a smaller coffin?
  10. If a gay king gets married, does their spouse become the queen?
  11. Have people who say “I slept like a baby” ever cared for an actual baby?
  12. Who decided that “y” could be both a consonant and a vowel?
  13. How could Cinderella have lost her shoe at the ball, if it fits perfectly at the end of the story?
  14. If hell exists, are you stuck there in the same clothes you were wearing when you died?
  15. Why do companies describe products as “new and improved?”
  16. If you’re sitting in the middle seat on a plane, which armrest is yours?
  17. Why do they put four more letters in the word “queue?”
  18. Can children who act in R-rated movies watch their performances afterward?
  19. How does a bald person know where to stop using shampoo and start using face soap?
  20. Why do vampires bother dressing so cool, if they can’t see their own reflection?
  21. Do Siamese twins need to buy two tickets at the movie theater?
  22. Did someone think it was funny to put an “s” in the word “lisp?”
  23. What color does a smurf turn when it’s choking?
  24. Who decided to put interstate highways in Hawaii?
  25. Can pigs pull their hamstrings?

Stoner Questions for When You’re High: FAQ

Q: Does everyone come up with strange questions or ideas when they’re stoned?
A: No, just as not everyone gets stoned when they smoke weed. People’s bodies and brains work differently, so their endocannabinoid systems don’t all respond to THC in the same way. Just know that if you do wonder about weird stuff when you’re high — you’re in the vast majority.

Q: How can you ever make friends, if your parents always told you to never talk to strangers?
A: Are you high?

References

  1. Burggren, A. C., Shirazi, A., Ginder, N., & London, E. D. (2019). Cannabis effects on brain structure, function, and cognition: considerations for medical uses of cannabis and its derivatives. The American journal of drug and alcohol abuse, 45(6), 563-579 [1].
  2. Konopka, L. M. (2014). Marijuana use: neuroscience perspective. Croatian Medical Journal, 55(3), 281 [2].
  3. Morgan, C. J., Rothwell, E., Atkinson, H., Mason, O., & Curran, H. V. (2010). Hyper-priming in cannabis users: A naturalistic study of the effects of cannabis on semantic memory function. Psychiatry Research, 176(2-3), 213-218 [3].
  4. Russo, E. B. (2016). Clinical endocannabinoid deficiency reconsidered: current research supports the theory in migraine, fibromyalgia, irritable bowel, and other treatment-resistant syndromes. Cannabis and cannabinoid research, 1(1), 154-165.