Smoking weed without getting caught used to be a much bigger problem for most of our adult readers.
Cannabis is now legal in the majority of states (although fewer than 20 have approved recreational use). And you’re probably old enough not to have to worry about being nabbed by your parents while sneaking a toke or two in your bedroom or bathroom.
Even so, there are times when the stealth mode is necessary.
Maybe you live in a state where weed’s still illegal, and you have nosy neighbors. Perhaps you have kids or a partner or roommate who hates the smell. You might be staying in a hotel room where smoking is forbidden.
All of those situations call for discretion. After all, we all know how difficult it can be to stop weed’s odor from spreading indoors.
Here’s how you can indulge without being caught.
The Best Way to Smoke in Stealth Mode
We’re not even going to mention edibles or tinctures since we’re talking about “smoking” without getting caught. They’re obviously the stealthiest way to enjoy weed, though, since there’s no raw flower to release telltale odor, and the bud doesn’t have to be burned or heated to create smoke or vapor.
What we will mention, though, is a product called the Genius Pipe.
It’s marketed as a healthier alternative to regular pieces, thanks to a waterless filtration system that also contains and cools the smoke before you inhale it. But the Genius Pipe is slim with a low profile, making it a smoking accessory that doesn’t look anything like a pipe. In fact, anyone who sees you holding it probably won’t guess what it’s designed to do.
Even better for our purposes, it releases no “sidestream” smoke. The only weed odor that you have to worry about is the smell of your flower when you load the unit and the faint aroma of weed when you exhale.
The Genius Pipe won’t eliminate any detectable trace of your weed smoking, but it’s about as close as you can come.
Other Smoking Device Options
There are several additional ways to enjoy your cannabis with much less problematic second-hand smoke and odor. They make it easier to smoke weed without getting caught.
The first is a vape pen. Most of them are small and easily concealable, which obviously helps. More importantly, the machine itself doesn’t release any smell into the air as you vape, and the odor of exhaled vapor is much less obvious than the skunky smell created when you smoke up.
If you have an inner sanctum at home where you won’t be disturbed, or you’re in a locked hotel room, a full-sized vaporizer will be just as stealthy. Your best bet is to vape juice or concentrate instead of dry flower, though. The bud you load into the vape is likely to be stinkier than the vapor that’s produced.
The final alternative to consider is a one-hitter. Since these small pipes are designed to hold just a single toke’s worth of weed, you won’t be packing it with much of the smelly stuff, and you’ll only be exhaling a small amount of weed smoke into the air. It’s easy to hide, too.
Your choice of a device can only help so much. Here’s what else you can do to ensure that no one realizes you’re smoking.
Protect Your Stash
We don’t mean you should hide your stash from nosy roommates or siblings, although that’s never a bad idea.
We’re talking about protecting it from airflow that can allow the fresh odor of bud to escape your stash container. Even if you’re not smoking, the smell of raw weed can be a dead giveaway.
Choose a stash box with a lid that seals tightly. A mason jar with a screw-on lid is perfect. Ideally, it should be made from opaque glass and stored in a cool dark place because exposure to light, humidity, or extreme temperatures can damage your bud.
Don’t keep your stash in a baggie; air can escape and carry the weed odor right with it. If you absolutely have to use bags, buy Mylar ones and close them with a vacuum-sealing machine.
While we’re on the subject, make sure your pipes are also stored somewhere smell-proof. The odor of dried resin can give away your secret just as quickly as a baggie filled with weed.
Use an Air Purifier
This is easier to pull off if you have someone with allergies or pets in the house because the presence of an air purifier won’t make anyone suspicious.
You can purchase inexpensive machines that will continually clean and refresh the air in your preferred smoking areas — and if they happen to clean a little weed odor in the process, who will know?
Solid air fresheners with a strong scent are a good second choice in this category if you don’t mind smelling their aroma 24 hours a day. Candles and incense can cover the odor, too, and smoke eaters will help as well.
Use a Sploof
You may have jury-rigged one of these when you were younger — and the good news is that they still work. The even better news is that you can now purchase commercial versions.
A sploof is simply a device that filters and traps the smoke that you exhale. It doesn’t have to be fancy; just take an empty toilet paper roll and fill it with dryer sheets. After you take a toke, blow the smoke into the sploof instead of the air. More than 90% of the weed smell will be absorbed.
Of course, there’s still the smoke that comes off of your joint or pipe to worry about. The old standby, leaning out of the window, can help with that.
Visit the Bathroom
Whether you’re at home, in a hotel, or visiting the in-laws, the bathroom is usually the safest place to smoke weed without getting caught.
Here’s how to go about it.
- After bringing everything you need into the bathroom (don’t forget your lighter or rolling papers), close the door and stuff a large towel between the bottom of the door and the floor. Make sure there’s no space left for air to flow through.
- Turn on the shower and run it as hot as possible until the bathroom is filled with steam. The steamier, the better.
- Light up. The smoke will mix with the steam and pretty much eliminate the odor. A joint is better than a bowl because you can flush the roach and leave no trace behind.
- When you’re done, open the window (if there’s one in the bathroom) or turn on the vent fan. Leave it running until all of the steam/smoke is gone.
- Take a shower. It doesn’t help to hide the weed odor if you come out of the bathroom smelling of marijuana.
It works, trust us. You won’t have been the first to smoke weed in the bathroom without getting caught, and you most definitely won’t be the last.
How to Smoke Weed Without Getting Caught
Q: Is there a foolproof way of covering the scent of weed on your clothes and body without taking a shower and throwing the clothes into the washing machine?
A: Showering (with scented shampoo and body wash) and ditching the clothes is the best approach, but there are other things you can do. Spend an hour in the sun; UV rays are pretty good at neutralizing odors. Some perfumes and body sprays can do the job, particularly if you don’t have to hug anyone else. And don’t forget to brush your teeth and chew some cinnamon or spearmint gum after your smoke sesh. As for clothes, there are sprays like Veil that can help block residual weed odor.
Q: Can you choose strains that will create less of a detectable odor?
A: Sorry, no strain will smell like cherry blossoms or apple pie; they’ll all have at least some weed smell. Indicas generally smell a bit less skunky than sativas, and some strains like Jack Herer and Northern Lights are said to be “low odor” varieties. But being careful about the strain of weed you smoke isn’t going to stop you from getting caught without taking some of the other precautions we’ve discussed.