65 Weed Sayings and Quotes Every Stoner Should Know

Sophia Delphi May 09, 2022 - 6 min read
Fact Checked
Weed sayings on a concrete wall

Everyone has an opinion on weed — even the people who’ve never tried it. The worst weed quotes and slogans, naturally, can be credited to people who have very little idea what they’re talking about.

They range from Ronald Reagan’s “Marijuana is probably the most dangerous drug in America today” to Nebraska Governor Pete Ricketts’ “If you legalize marijuana, you’re gonna kill your kids. That’s what the data shows from around the country.” And there’s always the annoying “Get High on Life!”

But let’s talk about happier things.

Some of the best weed sayings, quotations, and lyrics come from people who do know what they’re talking about. If you’re ever looking for something to cheer you up or brighten a friend’s day, here’s a small sampling to choose from.

Best Weed Sayings

  1. Yes, We Cannabis!
  2. Keep Calm And Smoke Weed
  3. Wake And Bake
  4. Puff, Puff, Pass
  5. Got Weed?
  6. It’s 420 Somewhere
  7. A Friend With Weed Is A Friend Indeed
  8. Don’t Bogart That Joint
  9. I Remember When A Dime Bag Cost A Dime
  10. Live the High Life
  11. Just Doob It!
  12. Don’t Panic, It’s Organic
  13. Keep Blazing, Stay Amazing
  14. The Sun Is High And So Am I
  15. Smoke Weed Everyday
  16. Weed The People
  17. Let’s Blow This Joint!
  18. You Can’t Complain When You’ve Got Mary Jane
  19. My Day Starts At 420
  20. Drunk Drivers Run Red Lights. Stoners Wait For The Green
  21. Alcohol Kills, Weed Chills
  22. Have A Toke And A Smile
  23. Bong. James Bong.
  24. Pass Joints, Not Judgment
  25. Why Drink And Drive When You Can Park And Spark
  26. You Can Succeed And Smoke Weed
  27. Let My People Grow
  28. Weed Be Better Off With Legalization
  29. Don’t Be Shy, Let’s Get High
  30. What’s So Great About Short-Term Memory, Anyway?
  31. THC: Toke, Hold, Cough
  32. Weed My Lips
  33. You’re My Best Bud
  34. You Can’t Spell Healthcare Without THC
  35. Stay High-Drated
  36. I Like Big Blunts And I Cannot Lie
  37. My Soul Smells Like Weed
  38. Weed Be Great Together
  39. Whatever I Do, I Do It Better Stoned
  40. Some People Went To High School, I Went To School High

Best Weed Quotations

  1. “That is not a drug, it’s a leaf.” — Arnold Schwartzenegger
  2. “When I was a kid I inhaled frequently. That was the point.” — Barack Obama
  3. “Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction.” — Bob Marley
  4. “It makes me feel the way I need to feel.” — Snoop Dogg
  5. “The illegality of cannabis is outrageous, an impediment to full utilization of a drug which helps produce the serenity and insight, sensitivity and fellowship so desperately needed in this increasingly mad and dangerous world.” — Carl Sagan
  6. “I think people need to be educated to the fact that marijuana is not a drug. Marijuana is a flower. God put it here.” — Willie Nelson
  7. “I think that marijuana should not only be legal, I think it should be a cottage industry. There’s some pretty good homegrown dope.” — Stephen King
  8. “I have, and I did inhale. Half my family’s from Jamaica, are you kidding me?” — Kamala Harris
  9. “It is an assistant and a friend.” — Louis Armstrong
  10. “I find it quite ironic that the most dangerous thing about weed is getting caught with it.” — Bill Murray
  11. “Of course, I know how to roll a joint.” — Martha Stewart
  12. “I got high, and forgot I wasn’t supposed to get high.” — Ricky Williams
  13. “Marijuana prohibition has done far more harm to far more people than marijuana ever could.” — William F. Buckley
  14. “I have always loved marijuana. It has been a source of joy and comfort to me for many years. And I still think of it as a basic staple of life, along with beer and ice and grapefruits, and millions of Americans agree with me.” — Hunter S. Thompson
  15. “Smoking helped put me in touch with the realm of the senses.” — Hugh Hefner

Best Weed Lyrics

How could we start this section with anyone other than Snoop?

  1. “I wake up early in the morning and it feels so good, smoking on some sh-t that you wish you could, jealousy, envy, please don’t feel bad, this weed is mine get your own bag” — Snoop Dogg, “Weed Iz Mine”
  2. “Hey-ay-ay-ay, smoke weed every day” — Dr. Dre ft. Snoop Dogg and Nate Dogg, “The Next Episode”
  3. “Rollin’ down the street smokin’ indo, sippin’ on gin and juice laid back with my mind on my money and my money on my mind” — Snoop Dogg, “Gin and Juice”
  4. “If everybody smoked a blunt, relieve the mind, the world could be a better place if everybody took a break and we all just got wasted” — Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, “Weed Song”
  5. “Some call it tamjee, some call the weed, some call it marijuana, daya, some of them call it ganja, never mind, got to legalize it, and don’t criticize it, legalize it, yeah, yeah, and I will advertise it” — Peter Tosh, “Legalize It”
  6. “I take a hit of that chronic, it got me stuck, but really what’s amazing is how I keep blazing, towel under the door, smoke until the day’s end, puff puff and pass, don’t fu-k up rotation, Hypnotiq for Henny, now n—- that’s a chaser” — Kanye West ft. Nas, “We Major”
  7. “So don’t sit around and cry, just roll me up and smoke me when I die” — Willie Nelson, “Roll Me Up and Smoke Me When I Die”
  8. “When you smoke all my weed man, you gots to call the green man” — Amy Winehouse, “Addicted”
  9. “Mary Jane, Mary Jane, I’m in love with Mary Jane, she’s my main thing, she makes me feel alright, she makes my heart sing” — Rick James, “Mary Jane”
  10. “I was gonna clean my room until I got high, I was gonna get up and find the broom, but then I got high, my room is still messed up and I know why, ‘cause I got high, because I got high because I got high” — Afroman, “Because I Got High”

Weed Sayings: FAQ

Q: You forgot Thomas Jefferson saying “Some of my finest hours have been spent on my back veranda, smoking hemp.”
A: We didn’t forget it. The supposed quote started as an online hoax in 2008 and caught fire, but Jefferson didn’t write it. The same is true for the alleged Abraham Lincoln quote about sitting on his front porch and smoking a pipe of sweet hemp; one of Lincoln’s biographers has emphasized that the former president was completely abstinent and didn’t smoke tobacco or drink, either.

Q: What about quotes like “Who smokes the blunts, we smoke the blunts, rollin’ blunts and smokin’” from Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back?
A: We’d need an entirely new section just for movie quotes. Maybe next time.